Renovations (House and myself)

Today starts our 6th week of renovations on our house. Thankfully we have been in temporary housing while the construction is going on and haven’t had to live in the midst of the mess. I know I shouldn’t complain about being able to update my house, and deep down (deep below the frustration, impatience, and anger towards my contractor) I am very thankful. I’m mostly sure that it will all be worth it and I will be able to laugh at this in the future.
Yesterday, Matt and the kids thought it would be fun to ‘camp out’ in the house. I kindly declined but told them to have fun. Then we got caught in a snow storm and I was trapped there. The good news is that the experience gave me the opportunity to see a few things I deem necessary to live in a house.
Due to poor planning (insert anger towards contractor), they did the demo all at once and we’ve been without facets and sinks for 5 weeks. Also because of that, we don’t have any countertops, and I think those are pretty important. Hot water is pretty high up there on my list of must-haves, along with interior doors. All of those things, combined with stacks of moving boxes and the awful mess constructions brings with it, have left me teetering on the brink of sanity. I often leave the house vowing not to return until it is finished.
During this process, God has been teaching me a lot about waiting, patience and control. I am seeking to find contentment during the discomfort of this period and how to embrace this season of transition. Many times I have acted like a toddler, stomping my feet and making demands. God lets me have my tantrum, then He gently comforts me and gives me peace for the moment.
Relinquishing my perceived control is a constant battle too. If i’m honest, this has been the hardest, most difficult move I’ve made. I have spent days second-guessing our choice on our house, our neighborhood, our school. I wonder if we’ll ever feel like this is home. I’ve spent too much energy trying to control many aspects of this change. When timelines don’t get met or things don’t go as planned, I’m reminded how I’m never really in control. Ever. But I know Who is. So I continue to trudge forward. I ask God for grace each day, even though I want enough for the week, or even the month. I release my plans and trade them for God’s, knowing His are always better. And I cling tightly to a verse my mom reminds me of often, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life”. Proverbs 13:12

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2 thoughts on “Renovations (House and myself)

  1. Anastasia February 23, 2018 / 8:08 pm

    Sarah, you’re faith is so strong and words encouraging. Love to you and your family during this difficult time of transition. We will pray everything goes smoothly and it ends up blessing you greatly. Love you! ❤️

    Like

  2. Kathy Hoekman March 11, 2018 / 5:51 am

    This is good for me to read Sarah! I’m also in the chaos and mess of the remodel. Thanks for the reminder of what a blesssing this is and to just relax!

    Like

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